Stupid Sign for my Neighbor

Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, "I'm Stupid!"  thus you wouldn't rely on them... would you?  You might want to step away from them and you certainly wouldn't want to ask their opinion about anything.  If you were to approach one of these people; it might be like, "Excuse me...oops, never mind. I didn't see your sign."

Some examples of people who have earned their sign:
My wife and I were packing for our move to a new home. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

Then there's the time I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big 'ol stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope - Talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign."

Last example:  I had a flat tire and was lucky in that I was next to one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign."

Are you get'n the idea here about stupid people or maybe just the stupid things folks say?

Well I wanted to pass along a story about the folks that live across the street from me.  They aren't my favorite neighbors for a number of reasons.  They are trashy.  They are rude.  They have junk cars.  They have a barking dog.  They have weeds.  And, one last issue that just gets me is they do not wear their "stupid signs."

Here's the story:
I figure they first got their American flag about 2 years ago because that's when they first tried to display it. Tried is a key word here.  The problem is they don't use a bracket or hardware to support their flag as it flies from a 5 or 6 foot wood pole. So how do you fly a flag if you don't have a secure bracket or some such thing?

Their solution was to stick it in a flower pot.

A couple of years ago, I don't remember the occasion, it was warm enough to have flowers in a flower pot and they wanted to dispay the flag.  So they took the terra cotta flower pot and set it on their porch and stuck the flag in.  They went in the house.  A gust of wind came up and the flag, pole and pot took a tumble.  The pot broke.

When they noticed the problem they recovered the flag, still attached to the flag pole and swept up the broken terra cotta pot.  Then, for reasons unknown to me, they got another terra cotta pot from someplace, set it on the porch and stuck the flag pole with flag attached in this new "stand."  They went into the house.  About 2 minutes later another gust of wind blew the flag, pole and terra cotta pot over, breaking the pot.  I wanted to run over immediately and give them their sign.

I would estimate they went through about six terra cotta pots over the course of about a year before they upgraded to a plastic pot.  I don't know if they ran out of terra cotta pots or had an epiphany.

With this upgrade to plastic the crashing and breaking of the pot, with flag pole firmly buried as deep as it would go, stopped.  That is to say the breaking of the pot stopped, the flag and pole continued to fall each and every time they displayed their flag.

That was the case until today.  It's the 9th anniversary of 9-11and I was happy to see my neighbors put out the American Flag.  They have flown the flag a number of times and if it wasn't for their stupidity I would applaud them.

They have upgraded to a larger plastic pot.  It might be 14 or 15 inches at the top.  They placed the pot on a small ladder apparently so the flag would stop dragging on the ground.  When I saw them put the flag out I decided to take a picture because I knew what was going to happen.  Remember, they have NEVER flown the American flag without it crashing to the ground.  Never.  One would think they might be able to project out a few minutes and predict what would happen after so many crashes.  Nope.  And they aren't wearing their "Stupid sign" either.  Maybe they lost it? 

After putting out the flag they left on an errand.  This time the flag stayed in position for about 20 to 25 minutes and then fell off the ladder.

Not only did the pot fall off the ladder but the crash caused the root ball of the plant to come out of the pot.  Not only did the root ball of the plant come out of the pot but the flag pole was broken.  Of course the flag was once again gounded.

Note: the plastic pot appears to have survived the fall with no ill affects.  At least it wasn't terra cotta.  The humorous part was when they got home.  The were actually surprised the flower pot had fallen over!  Yes sir, surprised... and they were not wearing their signs. 

Yep, gotta get these folks another sign.

Can you believe they probably vote too?  Scary.

Addictions

I decided to spoil myself today and pass on my peanut butter and dill pickle sandwich and go out to lunch. While I was sitting at the bar waiting for my meal I happened to notice a couple standing outside, in the rain, smoking.

Being an ex-smoker I understand they did not have an addiction to cigarettes they just chose to stand in the rain and enjoy their smoke.

Then I thought how lucky we are that there aren't more people with a sex addictions.

The Sad Story of the Boat Purchase

It was July of 2000 when our granddaughter was born.  Not long after that Ginger and I decided we should sell our Gulfstar 39 sailboat and then sell our house and move from Corpus Christi to Grand Junction, Colorado.

I created a web site with boat descriptions and pictures and waited for the phone to ring.  Of course it didn't.  As the months passed I would get an occasional call from a used boat dealer and that was pretty much all the activity there was in the boat selling arena.

Finally a fellow who lived a half mile away became interested in my boat.  We dickered about the price and I have to admit I finally just pissed the guy off and thus gave up on the chance of selling him my boat as he gave up even considering the purchase.

Fast forward to the summer of 2003.  My phone rang and when I answered it a womans voice asked if I still had the Gulfstar 39 for sale.  I said yes and she said she thought it would look marvelous sailing in Puget Sound.  I told her she was absolutely right.

We talked about the boat and I agreed to send her a copy of the last survey (inspection).  A few weeks later she called back and asked if she and her husband could come to Corpus Christi and sail the boat.  Sputter, sputter, eh.. eh... but of course!  A week later they were at our door step having flown in from Seattle.

With plenty of beer, soda and sandwiches we set off for a beautiful days sail around Corpus Christi Bay.  The winds were perfect and the boat performed flawlessly.  They were happy and, by the end of the day, in love with my Gulfstar.

They made arrangements to return in about 2 weeks and this time they brought their surveyor with them.  We had another great sail from our house to the boat yard where the boat was hauled out and the bottom inspected.  By the time we got home late that same day everyone was happy.

They left our place headed directly to the airport to catch their plane for Washington.  From the airport she called me and gave me an offer on the boat.  It was $4K less than I was asking but I agreed fast enough that she probably thought she should have reduced her offer.  The deal was stuck!

They were an interesting couple.  She was a lawyer practicing in a town east of Seattle.  He was the owner of a welding shop and apparently ready to have his son take over the business while he reaped the fruits of his labors.

From the first time on the boat you could tell he was warming up to the girl.  He wandered around on the deck looking at all the pullies and lines.  The deck rails and sails.  Checking inside the lockers.  He was all over her.  You could see him fixing this or changing that in his mind.  He was already having a great time and they had not even bought her yet.

They were nice folks.

They made arrangements for a boat transport to come to one of the local boat yards and pick up the boat.  I delivered her to the boat yard and said my goodbyes to that damn boat that captures your heart.  You love 'em and you hate 'em all at the same time.

Within 3 days the boat was loaded on the transport and off she went... headed for Puget Sound.  The buyer would talk with the driver each evening and was plotting his path from South Texas toward Seattle.  She would email me each day telling me of the progress and their growing excitement as the boat neared her new home.

The emails stopped after they were supposed to meet the driver as he stayed the last night on the road before making his destination.  They wanted to see the boat on the truck and take pictures.  Then I got the last email from the buyer.

She wrote that she and her husband had driven to a nearby town and did meet the driver.  She said it was exciting to see the boat on the trailer and commented on how big it looked versus when it was in the water.  She said the driver was even excited about seeing them launch the boat in the sound.  Her husband was also very excited and was looking forward to many days aboard "their" boat.  I knew he loved it... I knew it.

The she said, they returned home that evening and went to bed tired but happy.  The next morning they got up and were getting ready for work when her husband had a massive heart attack and died right their in the bedroom.